So before all of you hopeless romantics get excited and ready for the typical romantic, PDA filled post regarding that good old holiday we call Valentines Day, don’t get your hopes up. This is my idea of how this special day would play out if I had my way…
The Dream: After having a long lie my hubby will bring me breakfast in bed – pancakes with bacon and maple syrup is my preference. Orange juice on the side and the remote control to watch some Netflix while I eat.
The Reality: My hubby is at work so there will be no breakfast in bed, and instead of being awoken gently with the delicious smell of bacon and buttery syrup, it will be the smell of my toddlers very pungent poo drifting through the hall and into my bedroom that wakes me from my slumber.
The Dream: After devouring my delicious breakfast I have the time to jump in a shower and sing along to my Spotify Playlist, while indulging in my most expensive bath products and skincare. Even having the time to style my hair and put my makeup on, while my husband looks after the tiny human.
The Reality: Grab the tiny human, and head downstairs wearing the only clothes i could find in the pile of dirty ones on the floor. Dried in toddler snot and milk splattered clothing is all the rage right now, is it not???
The Dream: The house is gleaming from top to bottom and there are vases filled with the most beautiful red roses you’ve ever seen dotted all around the livingroom.
The Reality: The house is still a mess from the night before when I just couldn’t muster the strength to tidy up before I dragged my weary backside to bed. The tiny human is now only adding to aforementioned mess by throwing his toast aggressively across the livingroom because he actually wants chocolate for breakfast.
The Dream: The day passes by beautifully and come 6pm the hubby presents me with the most delicious home-cooked meal and a sweet wine to accompany it. The tiny human plays happily in his playpen having already had his dinner. The 3-course delight that my husband cooks is topped off with a glass of Pink Gin and Lemonade while he puts the tiny human to bed. The rest of the evening is filled with more Gin and Keeping Up With The Kardashians, without a single moan from the hubby.
The Reality: The day drags in and the tiny human has pressed all of my buttons, and destroyed the entire ground floor of my house. I have lost count of the amount of times i’ve tidied the livingroom and it now stinks of the 4 poo filled nappies he’s so proudly presented to me over the course of the day. The hubby comes home at 6pm and after snapping at him because I’m so tired, he decides to make dinner (toast and beans) while I feed the tiny human and get him ready for bed. After trying for 2 hours to get him down to sleep I finally settle down on the couch only to find its Champions League night and the football is on. I drink half a bottle of Gin, three quarters of a box of Milk Tray (who am I kidding, it’s the entire box) and go to bed.
Happy Valentines Day lovelies! ❤️